Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
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