beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
