Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize