i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Randomize
