apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
