Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
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