I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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