But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Randomize
