Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Randomize
