its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
Randomize