Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
Randomize
