just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
