Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Randomize