I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize
