i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
two words: eviction party
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I am mentally ready for anal.
Randomize