Me too!
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
