Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
