Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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