I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Randomize
