Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
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