the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I forget how to act sober
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