I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
