Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize