he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
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