I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
