You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
