he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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