How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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