Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
