Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Randomize
