If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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