I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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