Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
