Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
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