"it" just moved
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Randomize
