some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
how drunk are you?
Several
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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