apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
