i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
If I die, sorry about rent.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Randomize
