Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
