Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
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