Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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