Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
did i walk over a car last night?
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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