she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Randomize
