Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
