the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
