SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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