your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
