one two three fourrrrnication!
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
