I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize
