it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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