How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
